Jennifer Graf Groneberg

Reader's Guide to Road Map to Holland:

1. In the first chapter, Groneberg lists some of the stereotypes she envisions when she thinks of Down syndrome (p. 13). What were your preconceptions about Down syndrome? Had you known anyone with Down syndrome, prior to reading Road Map to Holland? Had you known any babies with Down syndrome, in particular?

2. Chapter 2 includes the introduction of what Groneberg calls “the woo-woo cards.” Have you  experienced anything similar to what she describes—namely, ordinary objects or events taking on a significant meaning? Do you think it was the stress of childbirth that caused her to feel these things, or do you believe there was more to it?

3. Groneberg comes across Emily Perl Kingsley’s essay, “Welcome to Holland” (p. 46 and p. 291). In it, Kingsley writes about her experience as a mother to a son with Down syndrome.  Do you think it matters that the diagnosis is the same, or do you think the essay can be applied to parenting children with other disabilities?  

4. Throughout the book, Groneberg speaks of guilt and feels to blame for her son's Down syndrome. Why do you suppose she feels this way?

5. The neighbor Cathy reacts to the family's news by distancing herself. Groneberg attempts to contact her several times, then gives up. Later, when they accidentally meet at the park, she doesn’t pursue it. What did you think of this? How might you have behaved?

8. Groneberg and her husband Tom have a discussion about the word “retarded” (p. 160). They decide to stop using it. How do you feel about the word? What about other, similar words that are often accepted as part of popular language?

9. Up until this point in the book, Groneberg has resisted calling the Child Development Center (CDC), but after meeting Robby (p. 166), when Robby’s mom tells Groneberg she should call, she does. Why do you suppose this is?

10. On page 227, Groneberg writes of a crucial moment when she finds forgiveness. Who did she need to forgive, and why? How did this forgiveness pave the way for the next chapter, which includes scenes of acceptance, happiness and joy?

More Questions?

If there's anything you'd like to ask, email me and I'll do my best to answer.

What readers are saying:

"It was a blessing to read a story that was real, uplifting and full of hope."  -Amparo

"While reading it, I was both crying and laughing...."         -Kamilla

"What I liked most is the honesty and the detail of the entire experience."  -Ruth

"Whenever I ask whomever I've loaned the book to most recently, 'How do you like the book?' I see the familiar look of eyes filling up with tears, one hand to their chest, the other fanning the air as if it will calm the fires of emotion they are feeling, and of course, a smile."   -Shelagh

"Amazing.  I am better for having read it."   -Jenn

"I think just about any parent dealing with a diagnosis for their child could identify with Jennifer's story, and that's what new parents need. A book just like this. A book that will be honest with the ups and downs, that will show other parents they aren't alone. A book that will make you say, 'I feel like that too!' A book that will make you realize the sadness and fear of the unknown won't last forever and that there is a light at the end of the tunnel."   -Michelle

"I read it slowly and savored it, not wanting it to end because it felt like such a lifeline to me. It spoke to me in such a huge way, and in many respects I felt as if she were writing my own experience word for word."     -Lisa

"Jennifer’s story really is, I think, the story of Everywoman who has walked in similar shoes. Certainly, some move through their stages of grieving, accepting, forgiving and forging ahead at different paces; but the realization that we share so much in spite of our different circumstances is powerful and empowering."   -Beth